No copyright infringement of respective owners is intended. The West Wing provides a glimpse into presidential politics in the nation's capital as it tells the stories of the members of a fictional presidential administration. In a first for NBC's "The West Wing," the Emmy. The West Wing transcripts -- search episode dialogue, summaries, and titles of all episodes of The West Wing tv show seasons 1 through 6! Buy stickers featuring the. The West Wing - Wikiquote. The West Wing (1. United States presidential administration, set mainly in the West Wing of the White House. Season One. Came off the line twenty months ago. Carries a Sim- 5 transponder tracking system. And you're telling me I can still flummox this thing with something I bought at Radio Shack? C. J.: Is there anything I can say other than . What do you want me to – . Yes, 1. 7 across is wrong.. You're spelling his name wrong.. What's my name? My name doesn't matter. I am just an ordinary citizen who relies on the Times crossword for stimulation. And I'm telling you that I met the man twice. And I recommended a pre- emptive Exocet missile strike against his air force, so I think I know how.. C. J.: Leo. Leo: They hang up on me every time. C. J: That's almost hard to believe. Sam: Ms. O'Brien, I understand your feelings, but please believe me when I tell you that I'm a nice guy having a bad day. I just found out the Times is publishing a poll that says a considerable portion of Americans feel the White House has lost energy and focus. The West Wing (TV Series 1999–2006) cast and crew credits, including actors, actresses, directors, writers and more. A perception that's not likely to be altered by the video footage of the President riding his bicycle into a tree. As we speak, the Coast Guard is fishing Cubans out of the Atlantic Ocean while the Governor of Florida wants to blockade the Port of Miami. A good friend of mine's about to get fired for going on television and making sense, and it turns out I accidentally slept with a prostitute last night. Now would you please, in the name of compassion, tell me which one of those kids is my boss's daughter? Mallory: That would be me. Sam: You. Mallory: Yes. Sam: Leo's daughter's fourth- grade class. Mallory: Yes. Sam: Well, this is bad on so many levels. John Van Dyke: The First Commandment says ! If I'm gonna make you sit through this preposterous exercise, we're gonna get the names of the damn Commandments right! Mary Marsh: Okay, here we go. Toby: . Let’s not, C. J. These people won’t be staying that long. May I have some coffee, Mr. Al, how many times have I asked you to denounce the practices of a fringe group that calls itself The Lambs of God? Caldwell: Sir, it’s not up to me to—Bartlet: Crap. It is up to you, Al. You know, my wife, Abbey, she never wants me to do anything while I’m upset. Twenty- eight years ago, I come home from a very bad day at the State House. I tell Abbey I’m going out for a drive. I get in the station wagon and put it in reverse, and pull out of the garage full speed. Abbey told me to not drive while I was upset and she was right. She was right yesterday when she told me not to get on that damn bicycle while I was upset, but I did it anyway, and I guess I was just about as angry as I’ve ever been in my life. It seems my granddaughter, Annie, had given an interview in one of the teen magazines. And somewhere between movie stars and makeup tips, she talked about her feelings on a woman’s right to choose. Now Annie, all of 1. I like it when she uses it. So I couldn’t understand it when her mother called me in tears yesterday. So I want you to tell me from what part of the Holy Scripture do you suppose the Lambs of God drew their Divine inspiration when they sent my 1. Raggedy Ann doll with a knife stuck through its throat? You’ll do it publicly. And until you do, you can all get your fat asses out of my White House. C. J., show these people out. Mary Marsh: I believe we can find the door. Bartlet: Find it now. Lloyd Russell: . They like to win and they like to gloat. Lloyd Russell: I'm sure you're wrong. Mandy: I'm sure I'm not. Lloyd Russell: There are very serious people working at the White House. A blow is struck for party unity today, there's no cause to gloat. Great day in the morning, people, victory is mine. Donna: Morning Josh. Josh: I drink from the keg of glory, Donna. Bring me the finest muffins and bagels in all the land. Donna: It's going to be an unbearable day. Toby: Mrs. Landingham, does the President have free time this morning? Mrs. Landingham: The President has nothing but free time, Toby. Right now he's in the residence eating Cheerios and enjoying Regis and Kathie Lee. Should I get him for you? Toby: Sarcasm's a disturbing thing coming from a woman of your age, Mrs. Landingham. Mrs. Landingham: What age would that be, Toby? Toby: .. Late twenties? Mrs. Landingham: Atta boy. Toby: Can I have a cookie? Mrs. Landingham: No. Landingham: Good morning, Sam. Sam: Good morning. Mrs. Landingham: Have a cookie, Sam. C. J.: Sir, this may be a good time to talk about your sense of humor. Bartlet: I've got an intelligence briefing, a security briefing, and a 9. You sure this is a good time to talk about my sense of humor? C. J.: No. Bartlet: Me neither. C. J.: It's just that it's not the first time that it's happened. Bartlet: I know. Toby: We're talking about Texas, sir. Bartlet: I know. C. J.: USA Today asks you why you don't spend more time campaigning in Texas and you say it's because you don't look good in funny hats. Sam: It was big hats. C. J.: What difference does it make? Bartlet: It makes a difference. C. J.: The point is we got whomped in Texas. Josh: We got whomped in Texas twice. C. J.: We got whomped in the primary and we got whomped in November. Bartlet: I think I was there. C. J.: And it was avoidable. Sir. Bartlet: C. J., on your tombstone it's gonna read 'Post hoc ergo propter hoc.'CJ: Okay, but none of my visitors are going to be able to understand my tombstone. Bartlet: Twenty- seven lawyers in the room, anybody know 'post hoc, ergo propter hoc'? Josh? Josh: Ah, post, after hoc, ergo, therefore.. After hoc, therefore something else hoc. Bartlet: Thank you. Leo. Leo: 'After it, therefore because of it'. Bartlet: 'After it, therefore because of it'. It means one thing follows the other, therefore it was caused by the other. But it's not always true. In fact it's hardly ever true. We did not lose Texas because of the hat joke. Do you know when we lost Texas? C. J.: When you learned to speak Latin? Bartlet: Go figure. Bartlet: I don't need a flu shot. Morris: You do need a flu shot. Bartlet: How do I know this isn't the start of a military coup? Morris: Sir? Bartlet: I want the Secret Service in here right away. Morris: In the event of a military coup, sir, what makes you think the Secret Service is gonna be on your side? Bartlet: Now that's a thought that's gonna fester. Sam: About a week ago I accidentally slept with a prostitute. Toby: Really? Sam: Yes. Toby: You accidentally slept with a prostitute. Sam: Call girl. Toby: Accidentally. Sam: Yes. Toby: I don't understand. Did you trip over something? Josh: A couple of things for you to bear in mind. First of all, he didn't know she was a call girl when he slept with her. He didn't pay her. He didn't participate in, have knowledge of, or witness anything illegal. Or for that matter, unethical, amoral, or suspect. C. J.: Okay. A couple things for you to bear in mind. None of that matters on Hard Copy! Josh: You're overreacting. C. J.: Am I? Josh: Yes. C. J.: As women are prone to do. Josh: That's not what I meant. C. J.: That's always what you mean. Josh: You know what, C. J., I really think I'm the best judge of what I mean, you paranoid Berkeleyshiksafeminista! Well, I've got a staff meeting to go to and so do you, you elitist Harvard fascist missed- the- dean's- list- two- semesters- in- a- row Yankee jackass! Josh: Feel better getting that off your chest there, C. J.? C. J.: I'm a whole new woman. Josh: You look like a million bucks, by the way. C. J.: Don't try to make up with me. Sam: . The President better not be planning on making any visits to this base. If he does, he may not get out alive.? Sitting there with military officers? Josh: Don't take the bait. Toby: Josh. Josh: Don't take the bait! Toby: You'd better believe I'm going to take the bait. Leo: There ought to be a law against it. Josh: Why'd you get him started?! How about threatening the life of the President? He was talking to other people: how about conspiracy? They were military officers, how about treason? That was a member of our own party, Leo. That was a Democrat who said that! Leo: It's bad, I know. Toby: That's it? Leo: What are you going to do? Toby: Have the Justice Department bring him in pending felony charges. Josh: Toby's right. What's the good of being in power if you're not going to haul your enemies in for questioning? Toby: We're really not gonna do anything about this? Leo: Yeah, cause what we really need to do is arrest people for being mean to the President. Toby: There is no law. There is no decency. Josh: He’s just getting that now. Bartlet: What's the virtue of the proportional response? Admiral Fitzwallace: I'm sorry? Bartlet: What is the virtue of a proportional response? Why's it good? They hit an airplane, so we hit a transmitter, right? That's a proportional response. Admiral Fitzwallace: Sir, in the case of Pericles 1 - -Bartlet: . I mean, this is what we do. Leo: Yes, sir, it's what we do. It's what we've always done. Bartlet: Well, if it's what we do, if it's what we've always done, don't they know we're going to do it? Leo: Sir, if you'd turn your attention to Pericles 1 - -Bartlet: I have turned my attention to Pericles 1. It's two ammo dumps, an abandoned railroad bridge and a Syrian intelligence agency. Admiral Fitzwallace: Those are four highly- rated targets, sir. Bartlet: But they know we're gonna do that. They know we're gonna do that! Those areas have been abandoned for three days now. We know that from the satellite, right? We have the intelligence. It's the cost of doing business. It's been factored in, right? Leo: Mr. President - -Bartlet: Am I right, or am I missing something here? Admiral Fitzwallace: No, sir. You're right, sir. Bartlet: Then I ask again, what is the virtue of a proportional response? Admiral Fitzwallace: It isn't virtuous, Mr. It's all there is, sir. Bartlet: It is not all there is. Leo: Sir, Admiral Fitzwallace - -Admiral Fitzwallace: Excuse me, Leo.. Mr. President, just what else is there? Bartlet: The disproportional response. The Debate . Forrest Sawyer, the moderator, recites the rules. Both Santos and Vinnick, during Vinnick's initial statement, Vinnick suggests dropping the rules. Santos agrees. Santos interrupts saying they've already tripled the border patrols, which was proven ineffective. Santos calls him on it via the GOP record.
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